Thursday, January 2, 2020

Wishes are the first step



I've been thinking about wishes, largely because I tend to look down on them as impractical. The truth of the matter is, the impetus for goals comes from wishes.

What are wishes?
This is easy. Wishes are thoughts about what we want to happen. They are the expression of fantasy. Fantasy is a video clip of our desires, wishes are the sound bite. 

Fantasy, as well as the resulting wishes, come from our values, which in turn come from our emotional and cognitive responses to formative experiences, some of which are transmitted to us by our childhood interactions with caretakers.

I grew up in a creative family -- my mother took photographs and designed multimedia projects and my dad did woodworking. Thus I learned that creativity was valued in my family, I learned from my teachers that I had a skill for writing. These developed my value that getting recognition for creativity was important.

I fantasize about getting a book contract. It's a movie in my head. From it I extrapolate the wish to get published.


Wishes are translated into goals
We have limited resources and abundant wishes, so we have to prioritize which ones we act upon. When we decide to process a wish into steps we can act upon, it becomes a goal. So my raw goal is to get published.


Goals are then clarified
We can't act upon goals until we've clarified two things: 

  1. what resources (time, money, etc.) we can allocate to fulfill the goal
  2. actions to take to fulfill the goal
To make strong goals, we need to answer the queries "who, what, where, when, why, how many, how much". So I come up with "I will have my first book traditionally within the next five years."

Goals that go through the SMART philosophy (specific, measurable, achievable, relevant, time-bound) become even stronger. When I do this to my goal, it falls apart somewhat when examined:

  • Specific: Yes, I covered the query questions above
  • Measurable: "book traditionally published" is measurable
  • Relevant: I think so
  • Time-bound: Yes
  • Achievable: here's the big problem. This goal has nothing to do with what I can do, but a result that's out of my control. I need to rewrite this goal into one or more goals that will be things I can take action on, which I have articulated here


The goal becomes the plan
Because I have done the prior steps, I can act upon those specific goals. The goals inform the plan, which is the series of actions that it will take to fulfill the plan.

Then it's time to act.
You have a trajectory, a time limit, and the steps toward winning. Now it's up to you.


Without goals, our wishes flounder. But without wishes, we have nothing to make goals from.








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