Practicing my query synopsis for Whose Hearts are Mountains

Anna Schmidt, a shell-shocked anthropologist, searches cross-country for the origin of an elusive folk tale in the wilds of the former United States. She holds her own secrets as the daughter of the premier cryptologist of the era, on the run by her deceased stepfather's urging. She finds tantalizing hints of the tale, threats to her life, and unlikely connections -- and a threat against humanity that only she, with her knowledge of cryptology, can solve.

The Beginnings of a Novel

The outline for the new book is going very slowly ...

Let me explain the general idea of the book. This is in the Archetype series, none of which has gone to developmental edit yet. A little background: Archetypes are near-immortal beings who are tasked with holding humanity's cultural memories. If the Archetype for an ethnicity dies, all of the people whose patterns they hold die, so that an entire ethnic group (and, more likely, a large group of people of mixed ethnicity that includes that group) die.  This is why Archetypes have been held apart from humans and each other.

My series covers the interactions between one particular renegade family (unique in that Archetypes don't generally have family bonds) and humans. The humans have their own uniqueness in that they have been gifted with abilities by (depending on who you ask) Gaia, the Maker of the Archetypes, God, or genetic enhancement.

The story I'm writing, tentatively called Gods' Seeds, involves two threads that will come together as the story develops. But here's a first attempt at synopsis:

The Council of the Oldest, the ruling body of the Archetypes, has announced that humans' genetic and cultural memories will be gradually divested back to their humans, as humans have been found fit to retain them. Meanwhile, a young woman on Earth named Leah Inhofer sees horrific visions of Archetypes battling each other, with thousands of human casualties resulting. The Archetypes grow restless, knowing that their reason for existence is being taken away, and they will take desperate measures to keep this from happening. The conflict draws battle lines between Archetype and Archetype, and Leah must find the strength to stand between the two -- or watch the decimation of humanity.

****

There's a lot of writing in-between this paragraph and a novel. There's character, there's subplots, there's relationships between characters. And there's a lot of words -- about 80,000 words on average. That's why I'm going to write an outline, to help me find my way through the plot of the novel.

Wish me luck, and let me know if you'd read this novel!

6000 Words

I'm in the difficult position on figuring out where to put 6000 words back into Voyageurs.

This is harder than it sounds. Or, rather, doing it well is harder than it sounds. More dialogue might be a good thing, but it has to be the right dialogue -- developing character or plot without sounding like the words were crowbarred into the text.

Adding words, to me, is harder than editing. I've edited my professional papers for years -- the real challenge in academic writing is editing a synopsis of the paper to fifty words, which reads something like this:

Researchers hypothesized that subjects would be more likely to buy the pre-owned car than the used car. One hundred and twenty-three students in a convenience sample received either a used car or the pre-owned car catalog entry.  Subjects viewed both cars with equal likelihood of buying.

There's so much more I could have said about the research this synopsis came from. This, by the way, is the type of writing one has to do for the summary a book in a query letter. You get one, maybe two paragraphs in a query letter (but more than fifty words) to describe your book. If the author wants to participate in #pitmad on Twitter -- a big event where authors pitch their books on Twitter -- you get one sentence to sell your novel, a statement called an elevator pitch.

Well, back to adding words. I'm really apprehensive about adding words. I did add some descriptions throughout and one whole chapter, which is why I only need 6000 words. That's the equivalent of two-three chapters, which is what I cut out by advice of my developmental editor. I can understand why those chapters got cut -- they were action-packed chapters in a story that had quite enough action. My dev editor is looking for places where I can add stuff, so I may have to patiently wait to see what she has to say.